Date sent: Mon, 14 Oct 1996 10:16:03 -0400 (EDT)
From: Joey Markham
Subject: REVIEW: "Go Ahead... Eat Me!"
There's nothing kinky about Kinky World Productions. Actually, there isn't
much to say about this low-rate company at all. From what I've seen, they
make videos with very poor quality and while they do make their box covers
nice looking (but isn't that what most porno movie companies often excel at?)
they screw up some of the credits (both on the box and in the movie). It
can't be too hard to put a little more time and effort into making a video,
but when you see the sloppy editing and shaky camerawork you'll realize this
company doesn't care about quality but rather, hitting the adult movie market
with a flurry of wall-to-wallers that probably take a day each to make.
GO AHEAD... EAT ME!
no director credited. Kinky World Productions, 1995.
cast: J.R. Carrington, Kylie Ireland, Kitty Yung, Tess Newheart, Shelby
Stevens, David Hardman, Mike Horner, Tom Byron, Ian Daniels.
running time: 71 minutes
scenes:
- J.R. Carrington (anal), David Hardman
- Kylie Ireland, Mike Horner
- Kylie Ireland, Kitty Yung
- Tess Newheart, Tom Byron
- Kylie Ireland, Shelby Stevens, Ian Daniels
J.R. (looking nice in an orange string bikini) is relaxing out by a pool with
her boyfriend (David Hardman) watching nearby. She approaches him and they
embrace. He asks her how long they've been going out for and she figures
about a year, a year and a half. He tells her they've had so much sex but
he never fucked her in the ass. She says she's never tried it before and
just the thought of it makes her nervous (yeah right - J.R. Carrington? One
of porn's queens of anal sex? :-). She gives in and tells him he has to be
gentle with her, then she proceeds by giving him head. They take it inside
after and get even more comfortable.
- They both get comfortable in a living room as J.R. continues to give head.
She does it quite slowly, even deep throating David a few times. They kiss,
she takes off her bikini and they do a 69. J.R. gets a little nasty, sucking
his balls and tonguing his ass, but they get back into the same old routine
starting with a cowgirl. After a while, David tells her "oh baby, I'm gonna
cum!" but then he looks off-camera and tells someone (director, cameraman,
whoever) "I'm gonna cum twice. Starting right here on her back". Then the
cameraman says "ok, let me get in" and he moves forward. A minute later,
David pulls out and cums on her ass. Then he sticks it back in and J.R.
continues riding him (David still remains quite the hard man). Next, J.R.
lays her head on the ground and lifts her butt up on a cushioned seat while
David plows into her pussy (which is nicely shaved). Then they end up doing
a doggie, a mish, then back to doggie with slow anal insertion. J.R. gets
a rather weak facial (well, this IS David's second cumming) with one shot on
her cheek and another in her mouth (which she swallows). The sex here is
rather tame and both performers look a little tired. J.R. often glances over
at the camera (probably wondering when they'll be wrapping up) and the
amateurish way about the scene is annoying (shadows from off-camera crew
members, cameramen who can't keep still and performers talking to the
director in the middle of the scene - well, that's the editor's fault for
leaving it in there).
Now we see Kylie Ireland masturbating on a blanket outdoors (this is the same
ranch-like area we see in a lot of videos - you know, the one with a lot of
grass, plants and trees, a long white fence and a few mountains in the
background) when along comes Mike Horner, wearing nothing but a zorro-type
mask and riding a broom as if it were a horse (?!). He stops right near her
and tosses the broom on the ground, aiding the damsel in distress (I'm sure
she became distressed AFTER he showed up). Hmm.. but whatever, they just
get into the sex.
- Mike starts feeling her up and she asks with a smile, "Do you do this for
a living?". Both performers are smiling and proving they're good sports,
even when paired up in such a horrible video. Anyhow, Mike parts her bikini
bottom to the side and licks her pussy gently. Then he says, "M'am, it's
time to unsaddle you" and takes off her bikini bottom and continues getting
a taste of her pussy. She really seems to like it as much as he seems to
like giving it. He goes on his knees and Kylie begins to suck him off. They
get into an enthusiastic doggie (Mike even pulls her hair back for a minute
or two) then they do a brief cowgirl. Then she gives him a blowjob before
he pops his load on her face and sunglasses (which she wore the whole way
through). "Well, thank you m'am", he tells her. "I have to get a move on.
Gotta get rid of some more evil-doers", then he takes off on his horse/broom.
Kylie delivers the famous line, "Who was that masked man?" and the scene
ends.
The remaining sex scenes open up with no dialog, like a compilation tape.
- We open up on Kylie and Kitty Yung getting it on outdoors (on the same
blanket in the same spot as the previous scene - but Kylie's wearing
something else). Both girls are even wearing masks. They kiss, suck and
play with eachother's fake breasts and Kylie rubs her nipple over Kitty's
pussy. The only highlight is when they whip out the dildos and use them on
eachother. They work eachother up and even make the next few minutes
enjoyable to watch (to say the least). But, as the well-known saying goes,
all good things must come to an end and then they finish the scene with a
kiss. Sigh.. what a waste..
- Next, we are presented with Tess Newheart and Tom Byron (by the way, this
scene can also be found in Kinky World's other horrible production, "Crew
Sluts"). Tess, with her small chest and eager attitude, reminds me very much
of a young, pre-boob job Tera Heart. Tess starts off by giving Tom a very
enthusiastic blowjob which last a few good minutes. Then she lays back as
he sucks on her tiny tits then lowers himself further to suck on her pussy
(after sliding off her black laced panties). They do a doggie on a couch
(with more crew members seen in the background through a door with windows..
sigh) and you can tell Tess wants it badly. Tess loves talking dirty and at
one point it sounds like she screams out, "Yeah, Dan!". Anyhow, she does a
hot cowgirl with Tom which is cut short by the screen going black for a few
seconds (?!). When we are returned to regularly scheduled programming, Tess
and Tom are doing it missionary style as she begs for him to cum all over her
face. He does and she really loves it. While Tess brings the hottest
performance to this video, she still can't save it by herself. The color
sometimes goes bright (making them look pale) and that few seconds of staring
at a completely black screen really cuts down the heat that was quickly being
built between them.
- We've all heard of 'saving the best for last'. The producers must have
been listening with deaf ears because this is NOT the way to end a video.
What we have now is a boring threeway with Kylie, Shelby Stevens and long
haired rocker type Ian Daniels (oh yeah, this is another scene that can also
be found in "Crew Sluts"). They get into the usual doggie, missionary and
reverse cowgirl with the other girl touching herself or the others. Shelby
is vocal and Kylie looks cute but it's just so boring.. I can't stand Ian
Daniels, so he didn't help matters any. If you like watching girls share
cum, then you may like the ending when both girls jerk him off and kiss
eachother afterwards.
I hope Kinky World Productions does not continue to crank out videos like
this one. Just about every technical aspect you can think of contributes
to this company's demise: the editing's sloppy, the camerawork is shaky, the
coloring is dull, the crew can be seen and heard, etc. As for the performers
in this video, I can only think of one thing to ask the producers: Can you
say 'waste of resources'? So, if you feel you'd still like to watch this
movie to see any of the lovely ladies featured in it then, go ahead... rent
this video. But don't say I didn't warn you.
Joey Markham
Created: October 16, 1996 -- 11:50 AM
Last Updated:
Visitor:
169 “I can arrange all that.” Such Apaches as had not gone back on the war-path returned to the States with the troops; but there were five months more of the outrages of Geronimo and his kind. Then in the summer of the year another man, more fortunate and better fitted to deal with it all, perhaps,—with the tangle of lies and deceptions, cross purposes and trickery,—succeeded where Crook had failed and had been relieved of a task that was beyond him. Geronimo was captured, and was hurried off to a Florida prison with his band, as far as they well could be from the reservation they had refused to accept. And with them were sent other Indians, who had been the friends and helpers of the government for years, and who had run great risks to help or to obtain peace. But the memory and gratitude of governments is become a proverb. The southwest settled down to enjoy its safety. The troops rested upon the laurels they had won, the superseded general went on with his work in another field far away to the north. The new general, the saviour of the land, was heaped[Pg 305] with honor and praise, and the path of civilization was laid clear. Parliament met on the 10th of January, 1765. The resentment of the Americans had reached the ears of the Ministry and the king, yet both continued determined to proceed. In the interviews which Franklin and the other agents had with the Ministers, Grenville begged them to point to any other tax that would be more agreeable to the colonists than the stamp-duty; but they without any real legal grounds drew the line between levying custom and imposing an inland tax. Grenville paid no attention to these representations. Fifty-five resolutions, prepared by a committee of ways and means, were laid by him on the table of the House of Commons at an early day of the Session, imposing on America nearly the same stamp-duties as were already in practical operation in England. These resolutions being adopted, were embodied in a bill; and when it was introduced to the House, it was received with an apathy which betrayed on all hands the profoundest ignorance of its importance. Burke, who was a spectator of the debates in both Houses, in a speech some years afterwards, stated that he never heard a more languid debate than that in the Commons. Only two or three persons spoke against the measure and that with great composure. There was but one division in the whole progress of the Bill, and the minority did not reach to more than thirty-nine or forty. In the Lords, he said, there was, to the best of his recollection, neither division nor debate! His cheek paled for an instant as the thought obtruded that the man might resist and he have to really shoot him. "Good, the old man's goin' to take the grub out to 'em himself," thought the Deacon with relief. "He'll be easy to manage. No need o' shootin' him." "Them that we shot?" said Shorty carelessly, feeling around for his tobacco to refill his pipe. "Nothin'. I guess we've done enough for 'em already." John Dodd, twenty-seven years old, master, part of the third generation, arranged his chair carefully so that it faced the door of the Commons Room, letting the light from the great window illumine the back of his head. He clasped his hands in his lap in a single, nervous gesture, never noticing that the light gave him a faint saintlike halo about his feathery hair. His companion took another chair, set it at right angles to Dodd's and gave it long and thoughtful consideration, as if the act of sitting down were something new and untried. "Besides," Norma said desperately, "they're only rumors—" "Oh, I've found a way of gitting shut of them rootses—thought of it while I wur working at the trees. I'm going to blast 'em out." During the next ten years the farm went forward by strides. Reuben bought seven more acres of Boarzell in '59, and fourteen in '60. He also bought a horse-rake, and threshed by machinery. He was now a topic in every public-house from Northiam to Rye. His success and the scant trouble he took to conciliate those about him had made him disliked. Unprosperous farmers[Pg 124] spoke windily of "spoiling his liddle game." Ditch and Ginner even suggested to Vennal that they should club together and buy thirty acres or so of the Moor themselves, just to spite him. However, money was too precious to throw away even on such an object, especially as everyone felt sure that Backfield would sooner or later "bust himself" in his dealings with Boarzell. "Let's go home," she said faintly—"it's getting late." HoME干别人老婆嗯啊小说
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